Understanding Biblical Masculinity
In a world with conflicting views about masculinity, it’s important to understand what the Bible teaches about being a godly man. Our culture presents various models of manhood – from the traditional view to what some call “toxic masculinity” to an increasingly androgynous perspective where gender distinctions blur. But what does God’s Word say about true masculinity?
What is Biblical Masculinity?
Biblical masculinity begins with understanding that God made man in His image as a reflection of Himself. God created men to be:
- Physically recognizable as male (distinct)
- A reflection of God’s character
- In relationship with God (walking daily with Him)
- The head of the home and a leader in the community
This headship is not about status or power – it’s about service and responsibility. Headship is a burden to carry, not a right to exploit. When we respect a man’s role as head, we show honor to God because this is the order He established.
What Happens When We Reject God’s Design for Masculinity?
A lack of respect for a man’s role disrupts God’s order, covering, and blessings for marriage, family, and community. It opens the door to dishonor, which brings chaos and consequences. Since God entrusted men with the mantle of headship, they must be diligent in carrying out their responsibilities to lead, cover, and sacrifice for their marriages, families, and communities.
What Qualities Enable a Godly Man to Carry the Mantle of Headship?
There are three essential qualities that build up marriages, families, and communities:
1. A Godly Man Walks by Faith
“For we walk by faith, not by sight” (2 Corinthians 5:7). Like Enoch who “walked with God” (Genesis 5:24), a godly man’s testimony is that he pleases God through faith. Without faith, it’s impossible to please God (Hebrews 11:6).
Walking by faith means trusting God’s Word daily. His principles and promises become the foundation for your life, shaping your decisions, forming your character, and anchoring your soul through every season.
What does walking by faith look like in practice?
- God asks for your faith, not your forecast – He doesn’t ask what you see, just that you believe Him
- Faith overrules your facts and feelings
- God promises companionship, not clarity – He walks with you even when things don’t make sense
- God’s timing may confuse you, but it will never fail you
- Faith removes limitations and releases divine elevation
2. A Godly Man Leads His Family
“But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15). A godly man’s family defines the legacy of his headship. This leadership begins with his relationship with his wife and extends to his children.
How does a godly man lead his family?
He connects with his wife
A man must know his wife well to lead her well. When a man truly knows his wife, he learns not just who she is, but who God is calling him to become. Marriage isn’t just about finding the right person – it’s about becoming the right person for your spouse.
A virtuous wife, as described in Proverbs 31, brings great benefits to her husband’s life. She is:
- Strengthening to him
- Industrious and not idle
- Wise and kind
- God-fearing, which overflows into respect for her husband
He directs his children
“These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children” (Deuteronomy 6:6-7). A godly man teaches his children the ways of the Lord by first being a living example. Children learn obedience by seeing it modeled.
He protects his household
“Fight for your families, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes” (Nehemiah 4:14). A godly man protects the presence of God in his home by cultivating a spiritual climate where peace can dwell, truth can grow, and God is acknowledged daily.
He inspects his own character
“Search me, O God, and know my heart… Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life” (Psalm 139:23-24). A godly man examines himself daily for the purpose of finishing well. He humbles himself before God rather than blaming others when things go wrong.
He projects vision for the family
“Where there is no vision, the people perish” (Proverbs 29:18). A godly man guides with clarity to show his family how to walk in God’s plan so they become a witness of God’s faithfulness. He has a vision beyond himself for generations to come.
3. A Godly Man Lives in Fellowship
A godly man does not walk alone. “It is not good for man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18). “Two are better than one… if either of them falls down, one can help the other up” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10).
Who should be in a man’s circle of influence?
- Parents – They provide foundation, legacy, and blessing. Their role is to be your counselor, cover, comfort, and corrector. “Listen to your father who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old” (Proverbs 23:22).
- Mentors – Someone who sharpens you. Their role is to teach, guide, and challenge you. You are sharpened by those who won’t let you stay dull.
- Friends/Encouragers – Their role is to support, inspire, and build. Everyone needs someone who believes in them until they have the courage to believe in themselves.
- Disciples – People you pour your life into. Pouring your life into others turns moments into legacies.
- Prophets – People who will confront your sin and tell you the truth. Like Nathan who confronted David, you need someone who will tell you the truth and not worry about being your friend.
If your circle can watch you fall and say nothing, it’s not a circle – it’s a trap.
Life Application
The biblical model of masculinity calls men to walk with God, uphold the mantle of headship, and live in fellowship with others. Here’s how to apply these principles:
- Examine your faith walk: Are you trusting God’s Word as the foundation for your decisions, or are you relying on what you can see and understand?
- Assess your leadership: How are you connecting with your wife, directing your children, protecting your household, inspecting your character, and projecting vision for your family?
- Evaluate your circle: Who are the people influencing you? Do you have parents, mentors, encouragers, disciples, and prophets in your life?
Build a legacy: What steps can you take this week to build a circle that will outlive you? How can you surround yourself with people who sharpen you, serve alongside you, and receive from you?
Remember, a godly man’s faith grounds him, his family defines him, and his fellowship sustains him. The goal isn’t perfection but a consistent commitment to follow God’s design for biblical masculinity.
Ask yourself: “Am I examining myself daily for the purpose of finishing well? What adjustments do I need to make to better fulfill my God-given role as a man?”